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I am an almost teenager’s mom, and a friend recently gave me a book on the birds and bees “talk” with teenagers. I laughed because that is an important talk, but the “talk” in my world is much different.

In my humble experience, discussing long-term care needs with your family is a challenging yet essential conversation. I do not know about you but discussing with my husband how I want to be taken care of if my needs exceeded beyond what he or my children could provide is a really good way to dampen a date night dinner. But, these conversations must be a priority. Why? 2 things: 1. Do not put your loved ones in the position to guess your wishes. It is an excellent opportunity to communicate your expectations. 2. So now that they know your expectations – how do we pay for it?

That is always the question, isn’t it? The answer is not the same for everyone. Some families decide to self-fund their care while others rely on long care policies, often with a whole life product to fund their care.

November is Long-Term Care Awareness Month.

Just start the conversation with your loved ones. Maybe your parents are getting older, or if you like me, you are getting older. For me, I did not want my hard-earned savings and prudent investments to be exhausted just to pay for my care. So I have a whole life product on myself with long-term care built into the coverage if I need that care down the road. I want my children to inherit the fruits of the trees that I planted in their profession, not to use it to pay for my care.

I leave you with a few figures and a video For better or worse: Living with Alzheimer’s. I saw this feature on 60 Minutes the first time it was aired, and I cried like a baby. All these years later, it still makes me cry. Having a loved one who requires long-term care is hard enough emotionally without the stress of not knowing how to pay for it.

Have the “talk” with your loved ones soon.

These rates are from 2019 national averages.

Home care – part or full-time depending on need – $4160 monthly

Assisted living – $4760 monthly

Skilled nursing – $8790 monthly